Dear David,

My partner and I started house hunting about a month ago, and have seen several properties that suit our needs well. We’ve put in one offer so far, but lost the house in multiple offers. I was disappointed, but my partner was unfazed. Now I find myself hesitating when we see a home that might work, afraid that something better will come along. How can I get past this fear of making the “wrong” choice? – UNSURE

DEAR UNSURE: House hunting can be exciting, emotional, and as you’ve discovered, a little overwhelming. It sounds like you’re familiar with the highs and lows that are part of the process: the thrill of finding a place that checks all your boxes, the potential disappointment of losing it to another buyer, and the lingering fear that something better might be just around the corner. 

You’re not alone in your uncertainty. Many buyers, especially first-timers, struggle with the fear of making the “wrong” choice. Buying a home is one of the largest investments of your life, and it’s understandable that you want to get it right. The good news is that if you’re out touring properties and making offers, you’re further along on the journey than you think. 

Fortunately, this is one of the best times in recent history to buy a house. Interest rates have started to come down, and are expected to keep heading into more affordable territory. Inventory levels are up, which means buyers have more selection and a bit more breathing space than they’ve had in quite a while. 

You’ve worked your way through the active listings that meet your criteria, and are still searching for your perfect house. At this stage, it’s normal for the pace of your search to switch into a lower gear. Think of this as the “maintenance phase” of a weight loss plan: instead of actively trying to see everything available, you’re watching and waiting for a specific type of new listing to pop up on the system. It may feel like you’re moving slowly, but you are actually zeroing in.

I sometimes see a distinctive pattern among couples searching for a home, where one partner approaches the process methodically, like an HR manager sifting through résumés, and the other treats it more like speed dating, relying on quick judgments and gut feelings. Both of these approaches are valid, and ideally, you’ll be able to land on something that satisfies logic and emotion. When it’s the right home, you’ll both feel it, whether it’s love at first sight or the result of a well-reasoned decision. My advice is to trust the process. 

PRO TIP: I help buyers avoid decision fatigue by clearly establishing their wants and needs upfront. When we do go out to tour homes, each selection is closely matched to the buyer’s criteria in terms of price range, neighborhood and layout. Because I do so much of the research ahead of time, we often end up finding “the one” faster than my clients expect. If you’re unsure of whether to make an offer or hold out for something better, take a breath. You’re doing just fine. The right home is out there, and when it shows up, you’ll know. #Advice #AskDavid #TheNegotiator